What Are You Calling In by Being Here?
It's a question with lovely layers of meaning.
By being here in this moment, in this geographic place, or by being here in an existential sense: in this particular chapter of your life.
By being in this life you've called in.
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I've been noticing how busy my work has become.
New clients starting, courses and speaking events, people booking the solo retreat; a beautiful fullness. And with that fullness comes the need for more intentional time management, more careful energy boundaries.
There's been a whisper of an old pattern - not quite stress, but the whisper of it. And when I noticed it, I remembered: oh, my darling, you've called all of this in.
It's a useful reminder that when we feel stretched by the stuff of life, looking at what we've called in - consciously or unconsciously - can be immensely helpful.
Is this resonating for you, too?
Have there been moments when life feels overwhelming, and then you step back and see - oh, this is actually stuff I've created, I've welcomed, I've said yes to?
I want to hold this in a healthy way. Without the risk of toxic positivity that can come from a blasé use of the phrases 'everything happens for a reason' or 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.' And also without the negative spiral of 'everything goes wrong because of me.'
Instead, seeing something gentler: recognising that sometimes the fullness of our life comes because we've opened the flow to good things arriving.
The Guest House
There's a Rumi poem that captures this beautifully. It's called 'The Guest House,' translated by Coleman Barks:
This being human is a guesthouse.
Every morning, a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
Meet them at the door laughing
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
Rumi takes this concept of what we're calling in even further. If everything that arrives is a guide, then on some soul level, perhaps, that's what we've been calling in? Guides, to show us the way.
This is where I find it helpful to move up and down through the layers of this thinking, so we don't get lost in a spiral of negativity ('this is all my fault') or trapped in toxic positivity, believing we’re not allowed to see or attend to the things that are challenging in our lives, or take accountability for decisions we’ve made.
Instead, we can see: this thing is challenging, and I have the capacity to hold it.
Recognising that somewhere along the line I was able to call in the resources that enabled me to be with difficult things. Just as I was able to call in the resources that enabled me to feel great joy, great pleasure, great happiness - resources that enabled me to be in those moments as fully as I possibly could.
As fully as I possibly could.
Not as fully as everybody else might. Not as fully as someone else. But as fully as I possibly could.
And these same resources help me resolve challenging situations in the best way that I possibly can.
This is about holding ourselves with the deepest loving attention, the deepest loving kindness.
Manifestation and Intention
There's this word - manifestation - that gets used a lot, and I have a curious relationship with it. I kind of like it. And I also hold it at a healthy distance.
What resonates more for me is being clear about my intentions and recognising that I'll be able to care for myself through whatever arises.
This weekend, for example. I'm back in the county of my birth, seeing family, catching up with friends I haven't seen in a long time. I've been very mindful about setting intentions, because spending time with lots of people, being in environments I don't ordinarily inhabit - that can be stressful energetically. I spend an awful lot of time in my own company at the farm, so being in the presence of many people requires real attention to my boundaries and energy levels.
I've been intentional about that. I did Yoga Nidra yesterday to help my system be in these beautiful few days in the most positive way I can. And I also recognise that if I get tired or it feels overwhelming, I'll be able to manage that too.
That's what I mean by intention-setting. It's not about controlling outcomes. It's about clarity and self-trust.
There's an email called Notes from the Universe that tells us 'thoughts become things.' This is the essence of manifestation teaching - the idea that everything begins with a thought. Every word we speak, every action we take. And Angel Cards tell us every building that exists began as a castle in the air.
I love that concept. Every building begins as a castle in the air.
We cannot create without first having the thought of what we wish to create.
But here's where I diverge slightly: I think it might begins with a feeling. My body understands where I’m heading way before my head catches up.
What's Beyond Our Control
It's also really important to be clear that things happen beyond our control. Our work then becomes understanding how we can respond to those things with compassion, calm, and clarity - in order to find our own best way through.
And when I say 'our own best way through,' what I really mean is the way that best supports our highest self and the highest self of those around us. So that we're fully grounded, fully present, fully able to see what options are available to us and for us, regardless of what's arising.
We cannot control everything. But we can be intentional about how we meet what arrives.
The Thread of Gratitude
The last thread I want to draw out is gratitude.
I am so grateful to be sitting in this warm bed, in this beautiful home that belongs to my wonderful friend. So grateful to be able to share these reflections with you. So grateful that this is my work now - essentially having a conversation with a wonderful group of souls, wherever and whenever you're reading this.
It feels deeply important to recognise our gratitude for what we call in.
What are we grateful for right now, in this moment? What can we recognise that we've called in - through those micro and macro decisions we've made along the way of our lives?
Even if the situation we're in feels impossibly painful, where can there be a glimpse of light? A glimpse of something we feel gratitude for?
It might be that we see a friend. It might be a tiny flower - some might call it a weed - poking up through a crack in the pavement. It might be the blue sky after many days of rain. The sound of rain. The feel of air on our skin. The breath in our lungs.
Somewhere, whatever our experience, there are places of gratitude.
Viktor Frankl writes about this in Man's Search for Meaning. Though I don’t recall if he explicitly names gratitude, there's an essence to his writing that feels incredibly grateful for the decisions he was able to make during his time in Auschwitz and in the years afterwards - decisions that meant he was able to maintain himself through impossibly hard experiences.
Maybe our decisions (micro or macro) have led to something practical or tangible. A job we really wanted. A friendship we notice deepening. The way we resolved an argument. Time in nature. Clean sheets on the bed.
Big and tiny things. They're all important.
The practice of gratitude has so much science behind it. Being able to recognise these things around us, within us, about us - being grateful for our sense of humour, our empathy, our body - it helps us rewire our built-in negativity bias.
Gratitude helps us be in the world with less rumination. To honour and acknowledge what's good as well as seeing what's tricky and challenging, but without so much judgement in the way we see things.
An Invitation
This understanding - of what we call in with intention, and our gratitude for it - isn't abstract philosophy. It's lived practice. It's sitting wrapped in a duvet, with an early morning voice still finding its register, asking: what am I calling in by being here?
The answer is always layered. Always both simple and profound.
What are you calling in today?
→ Listen to the full podcast episode What Are You Calling In? (S19E5) on the Henny Flynn podcast or wherever you get your podcasts.
→ Find more details and join the Quest for Gratitude - a free 21-day practice beginning February 26th.